In our instant-gratification society, there are toys and treats every which way we turn. Kids are psyched about this state of affairs. Parents, not so much. For kids, these goodies represent an opportunity to accumulate more stuff. For parents, it means that every trip to the grocery store, the drugstore, and the gas station has the potential to turn into a battle.

Here are 10 Tips to Help Combat the “Gimmies” (i.e. The Need to Have Everything in Sight):

1. Set Your Boundaries: Take a moment to decide what matters to you most when it comes to buying things for your child. Do you want to keep a tight lid on toy consumption, but not limit books? Or do you have a certain monthly spending limit? Do whatever aligns with your values and feels “right” to you.

2. Be Clear About Your Expectations: Let your child know exactly what’s going to go down on your outing or shopping trip. For example, if you go to the grocery store, you can say, “You’re allowed to get 1 treat, but you have to wait until we get home to open it. If you whine, we’ll leave without the treat.”

3. Stay Firm: If your child whines, walk out empty-handed (this is easier said than done).

4. Have Your Child Earn It: While not everything should be quid pro quo, you can have your child “earn” toys. For example, you can set up a system in which 10 stickers earned on a reward chart can be traded in for a small prize.

5. Practice Gratitude: Weave gratitude into your daily life. Get in the habit of telling your child what you’re thankful for. Humans are wired to see the negative for survival reasons (a remnant of our caveperson days). Look for the positive and notice areas of abundance, rather than areas a lack. Modeling, as always, is key.

6. Help Others: Do community service work and get your child involved.

7. Invest in Experiences Instead of “Things”: Shift the focus from material objects to life experiences. For example, instead of having a “special treat” be a toy, make it a trip to the zoo.

8. Pick One Day of the Month to Go Shopping: I learned this one the hard way. When my kids started to earn an allowance, they wanted to go on a spending spree at random times throughout the month. It started to feel like they were constantly shopping for things. Consolidate the toy shopping by picking one day of the month (such as the last day) to do it. Put it on the calendar so that your child can visually count down the days. This helps teach delayed gratification, too.

9. Add it to “The List” and Let Your Child Check It Twice: If you go into a store and your kiddo wants 2 toys but the deal was that he/she could only get one, add the second one to “the list.” This can be a list for birthday presents, Christmas gifts, Hanukkah presents, etc. Make a spectacle of adding the name of the toy to a list stored on your phone or written down on a piece of paper. Or take a picture of the toy. Chances are your child will forget all about the second toy in a day or two. If not, he/she can always refer back to the list.

10. Read Books About It: As I’ve mentioned before (probably ad nauseam), books can help parents get their point across without lecturing.

PediaWise Picks for Books on Gratitude for Toddlers:

Sneak Peek: Older children may also like the book “The Berenstain Bears Get the Gimmies,” by Stan and Jan Berenstain.

The Bottom Line

Most toddlers get the gimmies at some point. Follow the tips above to help minimize them.